Re-Calibrating

God I can't figure You...Yes I know I'm not supposed to but for what I'm going through, it seriously is big time pulling me under...

First this, then that...
Time and time and time again and again and again...
No wonder Job is recorded for his faithfulness towards You despite all that he went through...I'm not sure if I can...I know what I am going through is nothing compared to what he had to face but I'm not sure just how much more I can take...

I even question my own faith at this point...
I ask myself if I am still trying to wear a mask in front of everyone...
If people really knew who I was, is it going to change all their mindsets?

I'm exasperated at this point...
I'm moving away for a season, perhaps even to hide from You?
I know I'm being the joke here since nothing can be hidden from You right?
But it really doesn't matter now, I'm at a loss...

I'm sorry if I'm a disappoint...
I'm sorry if I've proven You wrong...
I have nothing left now...