Risk or Faith

Having the night to sit & think about life. Not exactly my life but to steward what He has graciously given me. Fact that things have turned out like this & for me to learn of certain matters, has subtly injected questions in my head.

I wish it could be simpler for me, a little more normal like everyone else. Truth is I may at times just want to fit in, i really do. But I guess the Call is just too important and significant to ignore.

So comes the days ahead. I foresee the road cluttered with potholes and obstacles along the way, yet sometimes in driving or following a path, one simply has to keep a constant lookout for signs. Tell tale signs.

In the first place, I regard myself as undeserving. Surely, there are tons of other options & candidates God can use. People with great wisdom, people with great charisma. The fact that all these years of "serving" I have regarded myself as "Not enough". The good out of it? Is always testifying to God's providence in my shortcomings. I guess that's part of the journey.

Things at work really don't seem to get easier. The point of me even harboring the thought to retaliate is so real that I envisioned what I would actually do while in the thick of being oppressed. I'm only human. I actually still have way more flaws than people see. I think ultimately, I need that counseling.

"Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city" Prov 16:32

End of the day, is a good reminder for me to remain thankful. "Always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ" Eph 5:20.

The small little of voice of God that reminded me why I go through what i go through. At Your very Word, I will stay put; I will stand firm; I will wait it out until You call me to move. My prayer that Your Will supercedes my desires and convict me in Your Spirit and lead me to do as You will.

So much to come in the journey with you. I thank You once again.

We Are The Reason

What I live for.

Stay Rested

Despite being a long weekend, it doesn't feels like it.
One can simply tell by reading my previous entry.
Plagued with typos in an attempt to blog before I nod off. LOL.

The busying on Good Friday.
The need to return to office on Sat.
The busying again on Sunday.

Things I've learned & appreciated along the way, yet I have to examine my lifestyle.
I want to be mindful of what I am choosing in life.
Else, I fall into a vicious cycle of losing my connectivity with Him.

And I fear that so often.
I fear that I lose the sensitivity to hear God in the hardening environment of my workplace.
I fear that I lose the passion & desire to wait upon the Lover of my Soul.

So I will keep my eyes fixed on high and far above.
To a Savior who gave ALL of Himself for me.
For Him I will choose to live my life.

GOOD FRIDAY

What I don't deserve.

It has been a loooong day. Up early in the morning for last min lrevisions to the sermonette, then off to church for Team1 practice. Thereafter was Good Friday Service, and yes I was giving a short sermon.

Then after service ended, there was practice for Sunday. To think i skipped breakfast & lunch, and it's always hard to imagine!

It has been a great day.
Thank You Lord :)

To know God is to know silence

Patience with God is Faith.

One of the most looked forward to weekends in the calendar year. Ignoring work calls and messages because I decide to reserve my time for Him. Never mind the storms to come cause God is my anchor and has planned these well ahead of time for me to go through.

I will praise You through the storms,
Be still and know that You are God.

Stillness

Those precious moments of stillness.
The timely delivery of His word.
Things I will not take for granted.
Much needed in times like this.
When I lose sight of You,
I must come back. I must.

L.O.V.E.

The biggest topic of the season. At least I thought it was so for me. Until I realize God meant it in a different manner. One that showed me the worst side of myself. One that reminded myself how badly I needed His Great love.

He had already spoke quite clearly once back then. I knew it but I guess I refused to accept it. The part of me that needs to be corrected; to cut off. So why this revelation? I still do not know, but I have come to accept that though I don't, I will trust and obey.

If it means to give up my dreams and desires. If it means to learn to get real with my fears and failures. If it means to find myself in a whole new environment.

To put it bluntly, God has been pretty nasty to me. Sorry I don't have a better description for it but yes, nasty. In almost every significant event/moment/season of my life, there is always that mark of failure. A scar that sticks with me till today, thanks to the superb long-term memory He gave me too. Yes I tend to remember things very well, and for a very long, long, long time.

I must say it has been an eventful 6 months. A season filled with much learning and experiencing. Fear and Failure have seem to find familiarity with me. Can I call myself a man of failures? Hmmm...I guess I'll learn that soon. But coming back to my point, yes the last 6 months I would sum up as amazingly good. After all, God who loves me is the same God who saved me =)

It's such irony that I distaste the fact that He put me through all that failures and seasons of valley yet I find stuff to be thankful for. Stuff that some might never understand in their entire living. I guess that's just me. That's just how God meant for me to be.

So Lord please keep my heart tender, regardless of how much more 'crap' I have to go through. Because I see Your hand in every situation and Your provision and providence always comes through. Because I am better owing to the fact that You meant it all good for those You love.
Because I don't want to miss out on what You are doing in and through my life.

When God says yes, He is increasing my faith.
When God says no, He has something better.
When God says wait, He is increasing my patience. 

Above all, trust in the slow work of God.

Just another (sun)day

Things to really ponder over. Over the last 48hours. The fact that I overthink doesn't help...

The cell dinner.
The timely sermon preached today.
The horrific sight at the coffeeshop.
The 40family briefing.
The soccer game.
The badminton session.

It is good to really be still and wait upon Him. Cause it is in the stillness where we hear Him.

New

A gift in every experience. Pure blessing.

A new experience, part of a greater experience. In my short time on earth, He is working in me to prepare me for an eternity of fellowship :)

Col 1:9-12

Prayer: 
continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives

A heart's desire:
1. Live a life worthy of the Lord
2. Please him in every way

4 parts to please Him:
a. bearing fruit in every good work
b. growing in the knowledge of God
c. being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience
d. giving joyful thanks to the Father

Finally
who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light.

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 During the trip, a quick encounter with Him made all the difference. 
My heart's desire and His heart's desire.
That just summed up everything so clearly for me.
So I entered into 2013 with a grateful heart, testify to a year of God's grace and goodness in 2012, and look forward to 2013 with hope and full of faith that the Lord has yet to finish His work in me.

The Least.

BEST FAMILY PORTRAIT EVER

LOVE FROM ZAC

DEBBIE!

JAMES AKA MASTERCHEF

D&J - DONNIE&JEAN ALSO NOW KNOWN AS THE SEETS

HUI LE THE FUNNY DUDE

JACOB THE COOL MUSCLE MAN

WEN POR THE TURTLE DOVE MAN

SIMONE

DIONE

ZAC. THE LITTLE BROTHER I NEVER HAD.

ZEPH. FOREVER BITING.

RACHEL. MY FELLA CAMP CHAIR.

BRIAN. HEART OF GOLD.

RAMESH. A BROTHER I'D DIE FOR.

EUGENIA. TOOTTOOTZ LOL.

JERALYN. OUR HIGH FLYING SISTER =)

EVIE!

ETHEL! MY LONGEST KNOWING SISTER IN WRPF!

EUDORA. THE COOLEST ON THE BLOCK (OR HOUSE).

SARAH. A FAITHFUL FRIEND.

  

Some things in life just cannot be measured in value.
Things like these. Friends. Loved ones.
I put this up to remind myself each day, each moment of how blessed I am.
I put each one of these up to remind myself to never take things friends for granted.

Thinking back what happened yesterday just blows my mind.
Because 18 days later, celebrating my 25th birthday was the least I expected.
Receiving the BIGGEST card in my life was the least I expected.
Looking at the coolest licence plate ever existed and the waterproof bag was the least I expected.

I know I really don't deserve all these, least I don't feel that way.
But even if all these didn't happen, I wouldn't value each of you differently.
I'd still lay my life down for you.
I'd still drive you back at the way to the other end of the island.

So may I never forget the faithfulness of God.
For He so loved me that He placed each one of you in my life's path.
I pray a prayer for you tonight.
May our friendship last as long as the Lord deems.

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I'm really not the kind of person who will tell you certain things in the face.
Like how grateful I am or how mad I may feel.
But if you do notice, really notice, you'd know how I really feel deep inside.
Just pause for a while, you'll see.

Know You More

And that should be one's goal in life.

If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him. ~ John 14:7

You won't know what you don't love. Furthermore, you can't love what you don't know.
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Really thankful over how everything unfolded today from the bus ride to the availability of breakfast to the orientation in the office to the two-hour chat with my manager to the availability of lunch to the self-reading time in the afternoon to the bus ride that brings me to various locations that I will need to go to. 

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. ~ Col 3:17

Seems like the coming workload may not be an easy one. Yet, a time of learning and going a on journey with Him excites me so much more. Perhaps it is the freedom and greater maneuvering space that comes with entering the working life. I won't deny there were little details that didn't fulfil my expectations and I had moments feeling bummed about it. Eventually, I got around it as I give thanks for the much that I don't deserve and how much more favor He has already given me.

The covering of prayer from Sunday's service has definitely come in handy and I have to remind myself time to time, why I do what I do and how to do what I do. Most importantly, who I do for in what I do. Coming into this company may seem random but I choose to believe God has planned for me. The company logo also reminds me of who the Center of my life is, the Trinity of God. There is a greater need for me to constantly re-align the center of life's focus; to re-calibrate what I aim for.

So I am officially into the next chapter of my life. Whatever is to come my way, I do pray that I find the wisdom and accountability along the way. It is a path for me to walk and in the unknown, to know Him more. 

And not forgetting, thank you for sticking around; for being awesome; for listening; for the bits of wisdom. 

This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord’s people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God. Because of the service by which you have proved yourselves, others will praise God for the obedience that accompanies your confession of the gospel of Christ, and for your generosity in sharing with them and with everyone else. And in their prayers for you their hearts will go out to you, because of the surpassing grace God has given you. Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift! ~ 2 Cor 9:12-15

The truth about Grace

Tonight was the opening night of the conference. So far, things have been awesome and we are all so blessed along the way.

Just this morning on my run, I just feel so blessed and free being myself with the Lord in my run. But I guess there is really much for me to inquire of the Lord especially in this season.

I must be wary of why I came all the way here for the conference. Also, what I do.

Tonight so happened was Joseph Prince's sharing over the pulpit. I suppose he was really getting his point across especially to those who misunderstand his teachings. I for one believe that he has valuable stuff to share but at the same time, i must discern if every point that he shared is biblically sound.

Thank God for people who have the faith to run this conference. Thank Go for preachers who are willing to stand in the gap and bring God's word to the people.

Be thankful.