Wait upon the Lord

Jesus spent 30 years of His life preparing for 3 years of ministry.
Likewise other bible characters who devoted most or all of their lives to serve God, the challenge came to me "How much preparation have I undergone in serving God?"

Yesterday's meeting was meant to be a walkathon meeting but somehow at the start of the meeting, no one turned up except Pastor himself and I. We ended up with a good hour chatting about ministry and full-time calling. He had been asking me to think about it and he wasn't even subtly hinting!
I did pour out my concerns to him despite the desire, and he was really sensitive and gentle to hear me out and gave his counsel.

In the recent spate of events, I figure there is still a looong process of transformation within me. I experienced what the Bible meant "doing things yet without love"; bearing a teachable and humble heart; and so much more.I've always considered myself "young" when I look at my fellow leaders but I have to acknowledge that continual learning must be in place. I must see beyond being the 'young one' and work on my faith through His grace, in whichever areas I'm lacking in especially.

One of the precious counsel I've received is being mindful of the presence of God, and this applies beyond my current state. I suppose it's one of the hardest disciplines to maintain but when one has consistently practiced it, one can discern His leading quite clearly and walk in the centre of His will.

God I want to do things Your way, even if it means praying and waiting on You. To trust You in this season of waiting, to open the door of opportunity in Your timing according to Your perfect will, simply because You are my Creator and You know best. I offer myself to You for Your shaping of myself because there is just so much in me to be worked on. The best gift I can offer to another child of God is not things of this world but my Love for You, so here I am availed to You. In this season, teach me; lead me and guide me to delight in You and surrender the desires of my heart to You.

Resolutions

And as I embark onto 2012, it hit me that I had not reflected and thought of a verse for 2012.

I have had this practice ever since I accepted Christ back in 2005 when UFS would put a lot of emphasis on stopping and listening, asking God what's next.

As I thought about the verse, I believe God reminded me about loving Him above all.
He put the verse Matthew 22:37 in my mind as I looked for the text.
Looking back, my verse for 2011 was just so fitting as it has been with other years!
My verse in 2011 was 1 John 4:7

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.

And back in 2011, I just found myself growing so much closer to some of the people around me especially my friends in church. I have also experienced what it means to love one another when my cell put money together on my birthday to support my mission trip to country M. God is just amazing!

And so I believe in 2012, God will teach me something related to Matthew 22:37 and to bring my faith to a whole new level. I shall not anticipate a good or bad experience but if God can use either experiences to His glory, then I guess it would be always a positive one!

Something interesting though is the strong sensing of love and life partner in me. Maybe 2012 is the year! =)

O Lord my God, reveal Your will to me.