1st week of PCP

Hey i'm back...early bookout :) really thank God so far for all He has done! Anyway thanks for keeping me in prayers...this week has turned out surprisingly good but of course, I have a good God that's why! Through the hundreds of diamond pushups and many swimming evolutions like rope climbing, drown proofing and water confidence. Thank God I had a breakthrough in so many areas.

2.4km run - 8min 21 sec (1st in the company)
1km swim - 20min 23 sec (2nd in the company)

All these by the grace of God and of course, thank God I am still alive. All these whackings and physical are not going to daunt me no more because God has His perfect plans for me through all these. Hallejulah!

NS life

Well, been a long long time since I've blogged. Some updates here.

BMT (Basic Military Training) is one week left. So far this 10 week phase has been blessed. Nothing much and training's still quite slack.

Coming up is 6 weeks (PCP) physical conditioning phase where I will be grilled physically all the time. Hundreds of counts of exercises. Pushups; Chasing Rabbits; Jumping Jacks...Why?

On the 7th week would be my hellweek, or team building week so they call it. Basically it is 5 days of non-stop physical exercises and hammering of your mental strength. 4 hours of sleep in total for 5 days, yup you heard me. 4 hours of sleep. Bet I can beat ethel's record flat haha...

Anyway, if you read this, do pray for me to have endurance through this time. If I have a choice, I would not want to go through this. Hopefully can get out of course.

But all in all, God the everlasting is here with me. It's all less than 28 weeks in total and I'll be done with the trainings. What can be so bad about it...God is everywhere and He is faithful. I'll just carry on in my walk, trust Him to bring me through because He is real and good.

Thank You Father for everything, present and future. I pray for Your peace and joy to fill my life. Bring me through this season with Your grace. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Testify to Love

Beautiful Song

National Service Part 2

Though NS ain't easy and stressful at times, I got a really cool piece of news. So ask me for it if you really want to know =)

God bless all, all in His creation. Believe that He never slumbers and is there for you and me. Ask in Jesus name with thanksgiving. Amen.

Lord, I have alot of worries and problems. But I thank You that I know You will make a way and I see clearer of certain things now.

National Service

Today is my first bookout day. Past 10 days was pretty alright. UPs and DOWNs happened throughout. Met really good cabin mates but of cause had some bad encounters with certain people in the company. Total intake for my unit BMT is 134. Among this, 2 have already been downgraded and out-of-course.

Life pretty much the same daily. Hopefully I'll come through all this. Thank GOd

Naval Diving Unit

Well so long to all of you I love dearly. People I cherished and kept in my heart. Those of you who have forgotten who I am, I still love you. I really have no idea what is ahead and to happen.

Lord, keep me going.

Accountability Group - Love you guys for the card, I will keep it safe! You guys rock my life!

SGcell - Thanks for the prayers and intercession.

Youth Ministry - Thanks for the care and prayers.

Uncle Mark - For all your effort, time and wise words.

Serene - You'll always be my best friend.

Ethel - Thanks for your encouragements, they really mean much.

Sam Leo - Take care sister. Will always keep in touch with you about the updates.

Aunt Erika - Thanks for the concerns always. Never fails to cheer me up inside.

And the rest of you whom I have not mentioned, please don't put a sword on my neck. Love you all the same. Cherish the times and people around you before they are gone. Life is short.

In my life, there are many things I have forgotten and let go of. Yet, some people and issues just will not go out of my mind. I choose to hold onto them. My prayer, dear God, take control of my life and let there be more of You and less of me. Let Your joy be my strength and Your arms be my refuge in times of need. Let Your angels surround me and guard me even in the darkest times.

O Lord, this I give unto You. A life of offering to You and a prayer of blessing upon the people I have met in my life. In Jesus most precious name I pray, Amen.

Modern Levite

9 more days...That's all I have left. Been 9 days since I last updated.

1 Sept: Church 35th Anniversary. This time was really a mistake to involve in 2 sections, I felt really stretched and tired after the celebrations. Somehow, they were all in the midst of my season of disappointments. I can say I was actually "acting" for the celebrations because no way I could give thanks to God after all that had happened. Once again, drained out after the celebrations.

I've been running away from God since the time I failed my pilot interview and subsequently, driving test. I could not accept the fact that He's taken the things of my desires away. It's been a year of rejections already. I can only hope in Jerm. 29:11 that He had plans to give me hope. I really need the hope soon.

A spiritual uplift would be at Modern Levites Conference at FCBC. I had no expectations or heart to listen when I signed up, but somehow God said a lot through the conference. The first verse I heard at the opening ceremony: You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

It just broke down the barriers inside my heart instantly. I have not been seeking God for a very very long time, as if a thirsty man who refuse to look for water. For 3 days of the conference, I learnt a lot on worship and going through Abraham and Isaac in a different point of view has taught me a lot. Moses and Joshua as well, the battles that were won if the men of faith kept their arms up high in the Name of the Lord.

I have not been holding my faith up high in times of battles/crisis. Perhaps all these desires have been clouding out God and gaining more importance than God that probably, better for me not to have been successful. It's so difficult to humble oneself again.

Some of you are going to be leaders/men of faith in unusual places.

I wonder if that was for me since I'm going into NS really soon.

I really pray/hope to come back to the Lord. It's been far too long a dry season and I thank God for the people in my life who have been there when I am at my lowest, I really appreciate you guys.

Nic: Unknowingly my spiritual role model and guidance in my walk with God. To remind me that someone out that is living for God despite all his short-comings and prayer breaks any obstacles in our ways.

Serene: My best friend. Giving me the encouragement when I really needed it. Though we have not been talking to each other for quite some time, but I'll still remember your kind words.

Ethel: Yup, I will keep in mind of your reminder. I'll try my best to keep them.

Things don't necessarily go the way you want them to be.

God?

Had my driving test yesterday. Was a total flop. Really disappointed with the TP system. Anyway, this has hit my faith level a second time since my pilot interview.

Perhaps I did not seek God enough?
Not enough faith?
or maybe God just doesn't want me to drive...

I seriously have no clue.
It's been a period of rejects and closing of doors.
Who am I kidding...

Things are going to get worse in 18 days' time.
Just wait and see.
Somehow, I know God is not making things easy for me to go through...

Back from China after 13 days. It's been a beautiful experience and enjoyable, how I wish I can stay longer. Spent most of my time catching up with my distant cousins and discovering new facts about my hometown that I never expected! China is a country that needs to be prayed for, I hardly see bibles being sold in China...

Well my vacation tour is over now. Driving test is up on Friday, pray that I'll pass cause it's really not worth to fail and sit for the test again. Only by God's grace to see me through.

Highlight in this point of my life should be my enlistment. It's just 22 days away! I'm actually having fears and doubts about it. I feel like I'm facing this all alone...thank God for accountability group but it just feels so lonely and uncertain. My unit ain't the Chao-Keng type of unit and I suppose it's the toughest unit in the SAF.

I don't know man. I don't want to just go through the motion and think negatively about it..I want to make an impact inside NDU. God, help me!

-Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Tapestry 2007

Hi All,

Tapestry photos are ready for collection. Those who which to have a set of the photos for Tapestry 2007 can request from me a copy of the cd =)

Alternatively, pass to me your thumbdrives or a blank cd/dvd to download the photos. CDs need money =P

Thanks and God bless!

-Marcus
HP: 97950535

RSAF Pilot Interview

Just came home from MEL meeting. Had my pilot interview today.

Reported to CMPB at 0830h. Interview was held only at 1300h. Long time of waiting.

Results of Interview: You meet the criterias for RSAF to take you in as a pilot. But do apply again after you have entered BMT as we want you to have a feel of military life before making a final decision. Also, try to listen to experiences of regulars who are serving the SAF in the meantime.

Intepretation: I was not selected for the next stage of selection. Kicked out at only the 2nd stage made me quite disappointed and hearing that I was not chosen totally devastated me. Being a RSAF pilot was my dream, desire and ambition. I wanted it so badly for many years.

I missed it totally this time round. I could have turned away and say, probably look for another career option(SIA?) or turn into an extremist against the Air Force. Why was I not chosen???

But I managed to get a hold of myself after the heart-breaking news. Look on the brighter side. I have not enlisted and they said I can apply again so they will interview me a second round. Anyway, I do not have leadership skills officially documented in my records. So for those of you who went for Outward Bound School, stop complaining because it helps you in your interviews!! To think some of my friends in the past went for OBS when THEY SHOULD NOT HAVE DESERVED IT! I was really pissed at this point.

Lessons that I drew from my interview today:
-God has created room for my faith to grow even more through my rejection.
-I still hold onto His promises.
-I still have chance when I enlist to apply again for interview.
-My cousin went through 10months of Commando before becoming pilot.

Yeah, so why the saddness?

Rejoice because the Lord is faithful and true and He is here, listening to every cry and plead we make. Amazin things will happen according to His perfect time.

Everyday It's You I live for!

Just as I was compiling my prayer list for this week. The evil One launched a sudden attack on me. Immediately I would say. My mum stormed open my bedroom door, ranting aloud her complains, usually unreasonable and irrationale to me, and going on and on. It was quite a common stronghold in me when this happens, I would shout back and just let loose my temper.

Now I thank God. I'm able to hold back a couple of times and just keep silent. Turn to the Lord. Let Him know how I feel. The same just a few minutes ago. I decided to blog this since it means so much to me as a 1st-generation Christian. I just knew the Devil would make use of this chance to pull me away from the Lord.

The temptation to scream and yell at her, to get out of my room and stop ranting away.

I held back! It hurts but I held it back. Only Jesus heals our wounds. The spiritual wounds that none can heal completely except our God. I believe.

And just as I was smsing and msning people to pray for my Air Force Pilot interview on Wed morning, two songs were played back to back on my Itunes and I feel God assuring me. The songs are Salvation is here and Everyday:

Cause I know my God saved the day
And I know His word never fails
And I know my God will make a way for me
Salvation is here!

Second song:
Everyday It's You I live for
Everyday I'll follow after You
Everyday I'll walk with You
My Lord

These two songs just came playing. God has His purpose in His perfect timing. Trust and believe it!

"For I know that plans I have for you", declares the Lord,"plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jerm 29:11

Then You will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. -Jerm 29:12

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. -Jerm 29:13

Lord, Lord, grant us a heart of hospitality and don't pass us by O'Lord. Help us to trust in You with ever-believing heart. Seeking You as a precious Jewel. Amen Lord, I surrender all.

Chasing around and around

It's been a fun-filled day for me.For more details on what I did, go through www.citychase.com and find out more if you're interested to know =) so here's everything in a nutshell. In case any of you were in town and seeing nuts people in lime green shirts running around, I was one of them :P

1100h- reached pan pacific hotel and registered
1120h- decorate bear and hang around
1300h- race begins!
1320h- went to draw money($50) to put into the bear bank as a task to be completed..wasted lots of time in Suntec Mall looking for one of the chasepoints.
1330h- Decided to head down to Somerset after solving the clue to Faber House. Task: to collect $50 in the bear.
When we came out of the building, there right beside us was another chasepoint! How great is that! I had to dig out a matching pair of Mahjong tiles before my partner chomped a mealworm down his throat haha. I had trouble finding the second "san wan" haha..Mahjong is bad! lol

Then having solved a clue to go to Clark Quay, we headed for the fountain there by MRT to end up carrying a really heavy beer barrel to "one night stand" pub. There, I had to whip my a glass of beer while my friend has to get someone passing by to drink it. Then we got to finish a glass ourselves too :) ahaha and carry the barrel back!

After that 3rd point, we dashed back to Clark Quay but stopped opposite the MITA building, some arts ministry building. Really hesitating which point to head next because we had a few other clues on hand to choose from. We ran to the busstop and saw bus 80 coming which we can take to Arab Street to Kampong Glam. We weren't allowed the bus because the bus was not designated to stop there. Guess what? We dashed alongside with the bus down the road to the next bus stop. There, we managed to get on 80 and head for Kampong Glam. We figured out several other clues like Crawford Street(Kayaking in Kallang River), Rock climbing for one while the other abseils at Upper book keng road and 2 more chasepoints at Kent Ridge Park.

It was totally cool until we got to Upper BoonKeng where we had to do rockclimbing/abseil. The faggot me got the grip on me while only a 1/4 left up the wall. I gave up! It was just too exhausting! haha...my teammate did his abseil twice by mistake and still could go up the rockwall! Gosh! I burned my hands down abseiling because I could not grip tightly for my dear life! Ouch!

Leaving the center, we headed back down to Kallang Mrt where we were going towards Kent Ridge Park. It was a pretty long train ride so we figured out the last chasepoint that we need. At Kent Ridge, we had to trek through a small jungle and at the station cycle about 200m of off-road track. Then we ran to another station to do high rope up. I was chosen to do it because of the coin-toss rule! Anyway that's just too much to name. Ask me for the wholesome experience. Last stop was Chinatown pagoda street where we had to look for some building that has its roof top shown. haha, we made a mistake and ran to Cross Street area when the building is a Chinese temple beside the MRT. Thank God for many kind souls along the way and also, some not so nice people.

Then after Chinatown and the 10th point that we've got, it was a mad dash back to Pan Pacific Hotel and we came in 28th position with timing of 5 hours 30 mins!! Not bad considering our first time and 28 out of 180+ teams haha...This race taught me a lot and gives me the motivation to try for more adventure races! Anyone interested? ahahah

Okay aside to the crazy day I had. Would like to post some reflections from fellow Churchie's blogposts...No directing at anyone but I just felt this prompting to post it so here goes =)

When someone tells us that he/she is too busy, pray for he/she to have time managed. Do we?

When someone tells us that he/she is too tired, pray for he/she to be renewed in strength. Do we?

When someone tells us that he/she is afraid, pray for he/she to step out in faith in God. Do we?

When we spot a mistake, correct the person personally and with love. Do we?

When everything seems screwed up, pray and intercede for the issue. Do we?

When the going gets tough, remember that when we're weak, He is strong. When we're weak, that's when we rely on His grace! Dear bros/sisters of mine in whatever issues you have, remember that the Lord is our solution. He does not deny that so don't deny Him! Look to Him and trust in Him! See wonders and miracles in Your lives when you start committing everything to Him =)


God bless us all!

Before the Cross

For Your Love is higher than the heavens
deeper than the seas
And all I want is You in my life
No one else
can satisfy my soul
and make me feel this way
Only You Lord, only You

Indeed the faithful God that we have in our lives. He never fails. He is the healer. He is the love. He is what we have.

Today just was an awesome time, and more to come. I had a really bad throat through the weekend and He healed me. He gave me the voice to lead through the service. I believe only our God can have such healing powers as a testimony to His greatness. O Lord, let Your praises be our lips daily. Seeing the youths praising you with joy and worshipping You in spirit and in truth, Lord I believe You visited us today. You are here, forever and ever.

The Lord leads us in a time of worship. His spirit guides us. Obey Him.

Dear God, You are the healer. I trust and thank You for all You have done. I pray Lord for more of You in my life, and less of me. Thank You for Your everlasting grace. Committing all I have to You, I pray Your will be done. Amen.

Friendship

Sunday's sermon by U Kenny was on Friendship...what a timely message from God. I felt as though He was trying to get a message across to me these few weeks, He spoke so much to me about what I was burdened with. I just refuse to listen. I simply refused.

Our God is an awesome God
He reigns from heavens above
with wisdom, power and love
our God is an awesome God

Indeed He is awesome. I sense a slow restoration in the broken bridge. Been broken for a long time, I have full confidence God will have His will done in time to come. He spoken to me through so many people.

The word He gave: "Wait upon me"..

It was not once but a many times He has said that...wait in His time to come that things will fall into place.

O Lord, I place my life in Your hands. Forgive my ignorance to Your love and grace. May Your will be done in my life and I believe You have the best for Your children, as any earthly father would have as well. Lord, I have full confidence in You to lead me on and I pray all these in Jesus name. AMEN.

Holding on To You

Been an interesting week for me...shall not share here...ask me personally...



That relationship has not been restored..God's timing is the best timing...yes



I've been giving it much thought. If Jesus was me, how would Jesus have handled the situation.



And it came to me, Jesus loved each and everyone unconditionally.
People who loved him, hated him, despised him, tortured him.

So what would you do?

For all You've done

My Saviour, Redeemer
Lifted me from the miry clay
Almighty, forever
I will never be the same again

Cause You came near
From the everlasting
To the world we live
The Father's only Son

And You lived and You died
And You rose again on high
You open the way for the world to live again
Hallelujah, for all you've done
Hallelujah, for all you've done


Like what uncle Francis shared in cell last night, what is the first thing in the morning that we do when we get out of bed?

Last night's sharing was full of gems and treasures that spoke to my life thoroughly. Many sharings and object lessons were exactly what I was going through.

-Faith that moves the mountain - Mark 11:22-24

-Keys of the kingdom of heaven - Matthew 16:19

-Whoever believes in me,as the scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him. - John 7:38

-Standing firm for Christ - 2 Corinthians 12:10

I want to thank God for His majestic teachings, His faithfulness and His abundance of grace. He can give us more than what we can imagine.
Are we prepared to receive? John 16:24

Suffering

God has allowed sufferings on earth.

Tsunamis..
Hurricanes..
Volcanoes..
Earthquakes..
Wars of mass destructions..
Civil violence..
Rape..
Murder..
Accidents..
Terrorism..
Divorces..
Family breakups..
Abortions..
Plus many more..

I want to accept all these events happening in our world today. I don't see it as God's punishment to this world for its sin right from the start of God's creation. It is not a sadistic God trying to convince His people that they need to believe Him to stop all that sufferings that are constantly ongoing. He is not going to give His children a smooth ride in their lives in this world because it is a moulding process.

The bottomline for suffering: Do I love God enough to trust Him that everything that happened and will happen in my life is part of His perfect master plan?

I believe.
Whatever problems I face.
Whatever crisis I'm in.
Whatever difficulty I encounter.
It is always a chance given by God to mould me.

Job. The man who suffered from a divine arguement between God and Satan, chose to hold onto God's character and not on the promises of blessings and gifts that God has. In this way, Satan who has tried to push Job into the deepest valley of his life, has failed in his mission. Job, walked through that valley knowing that God will be there and believed in Him.

The game has been set. The scoreline has been given. God has triumped over death and sin. He has provided a way out for us all sinners. Are we going to choose to trust in His character or focus on certain puny issues in our lives that seems to be magnified by ourselves. Dear God, forgive me for not focusing my eyes on you.

I must share this. It has been a year since that relationship I held was broken. I do not know if the actions I took a year ago was right or wrong but anyway, things are down in the valley. This relationship may not seem to have hope to be salvaged but I trust in God. It indeed is my will to see this friendship restored as soon as possible however, I was reminded that God's will should be what I need to follow. Just look at how simple things actually are! All I need to do is let God's will be done.

Things are always easier said than done. I've been praying to God that this relationship may be restored since I'm pretty sure God does not want to see His children stuck in a conflict. It's hard to take my eyes off the issue and focus on God. I am still trying but I seriously have no clue to how long I can hold on. Probably I need God to hold on to me because He never gets tired.

That sure was a whole of ranting I made. Probably some of you had faced similar problems as me and right now, in the same spot. Some of you might not get the picture I'm trying to illustrate. Nevertheless, I choose to believe that God is faithful and with Him, all things are possible.

Philippians 4:6-7 = Do not be anxious in anything but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to the Lord. And the peace of God that transcends all understanding guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Thank You Lord for the chance to ask of You.
Thank You Lord for pain I'm going through.
Now I know that pain of unappreciated love.
The time when Jesus, You were sentenced to crucifixion.
When You hung there and died, You were paying the price for my life.
Yet I do not know the cost You paid to set me free,
Forgive me today for I did not believe.
Now teach me to live my life,
According to Your will.
Amen.

What Do You Know?

Just came back from WDYK? camp from 9-12 Jun. I would say yes, it was fruitful!

Probably God's favour was upon this camp and all that praying and fasting by the camp com had been heard.



With no expectations for the camp except to do my job proper as the worship leader, I headed for Changi Resort with the mindset of helping out. I ended up being the leader of "Just Follow Marshall". It was a good experience with Joel coming in and out as a leader too. Thanks going out to Marshall, Luke, Yong Jian, Eugene, Raina, Dione and Sherry for making this camp so wonderful together. They were a sporting bunch who were willing to follow instructions given to them quickly.



As for the program for the camp, Thank God it was truly smooth. Too wonderful. With God's blessings, I tell you NOTHING stands in God's way!



Rachel Chan sprained her left ankle on day 2 while playing mass games. She had stepped into a pothole and somehow sprained it. She didn't do anything about it the whole day and was only till after the session that we found out about it. I was looking at it and I've seen how sprains looked like, she had her first sprain so naturally it was very painful for her. That night, I just prayed for her.



U. Andrew and Pastor Irene were the speakers for this camp. Uncle Andrew spoke on "Holy Spirit" while Pastor Irene brought us to the topic of God the Father and God the Son. Truly it was a simple yet knowledgeable session throughout. Highlight would probably be praying with Uncle Andrew and Aunt Shanti, Uncle Anthony and Aunt Erika. We prayed for the youth campers and helpers first who came forward. Some of the campers even got to pray in tongues for the first time. How amazing is He who can do all things.



Then after 2 hours of praying, the leaders were prayed for. Prophecies were released and Aunt Shanti gave us words from God and regards to our areas of gifts. Mine was the area of writing new songs and healing through the songs. If I got that right. It was an amazing, absolutely fabulous time praying together in the spirit! And after praying, Aunt Erika came up to me and reminded me: "Marcus, your prophecy last year has been confirmed again!" while giving me that you-know-what-you-need-to-do look.



Pastor Irene shared her testimonies and stories with God which were really encouraging. It reminded me that obedience to God should not be a no-no or later kind of attitude but YES Lord I will go for you! Here I am send me! Indeed this camp had been a firm grounding in God's word once again.. Another spiritual high, now to retain that fire that has been set alight!



A million faces I see

A thousand friendships I hold

A hundred souls I touched

Yet only few I shared



Salvation belongs to the Lord

Whom shall I fear

To share His good news



Hallelujah to the King

Hallelujah to the King forever.



Just beautiful. God the everlasting yet neverchanging Creator.

sigh

I will love You with all my heart, with all my soul, with all my mind and with all my strength.



The Lord is my refuge..



So many attacks within seven days, will I fall?



Don't have a solution.